Betrayed by a lover may be a devastating experience. Other elements, no doubt, influence how painful infidelity is for the betrayed party. When solely considering the following considerations, cheating is the worst form of dishonesty. There are few things more agonizing than an affair with multiple meetings, premeditation (intentionality), and both sex and non-sexual acts of romance like going out to dinner, lingering over a bottle of wine, or binge-watching TV shows. It’s a major mystery as to why being cheated on is so agonizing for the victim. There are several theories as to why this is the most damaging sort of betrayal of trust. Others believe that your rights have been temporarily revoked, at least for the time being. Because monogamy is the very definition of a monogamous relationship, you have the right not to be cheated on even if the relationship is going poorly and even if you’re having a “break” that isn’t an actual breakup (I will write another post about that in the near future). In my opinion, the hurt that adultery can bring is exacerbated by the breach of trust and the infringement of one’s rights. I’m not convinced, though, that this is the complete picture. Because of the visions you have of your loved one and the person he or she is having sex with, going out to dinner, and conversing for hours, the agony is generated in part by this. But why are you having such a hard time with the images in your head? It’s because you missed out on what you were supposed to be doing, in my opinion (without the other person). At the very least, another individual has temporarily taken your place. People who don’t have the same privilege as you do to participate in those activities are violating your rights. While you can’t own another person, you can own some actions with your lover while you’re in a committed relationship, such romantic dinners, nasty text messaging, and sex. It’s akin to having your car or house vandalized when such rights are abused. It hurts to have your house broken into and your personal items stolen, but it hurts far more to be forced to share your man or woman with someone else.