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I am raising my children alone


The end of a marriage irreversibly alters both your and your child’s lives. Living situations alter, sleeping arrangements vary, and finances shift in unexpected ways. Even when the other parent is participating in the child’s life, this is a problem for the single parent. As a result, all of these adjustments will put your sanity to the test. It becomes a challenge to figure out how you’ll get through each day. And those challenges can come at any time. It’s not just the worry you have on days when your child is with you. The worst days are sometimes when you don’t have your child and depression creeps in. You may have gotten out of the difficult toxic relationship you were in, but you didn’t get out of the loneliness you felt while in it. And now that your child is grown, you can’t even count on them to devote your time and energy. As a single parent, you must find ways to maintain your sanity. You need to do everything you can to retain your sanity since you still have small children to look after. In the midst of it all, I have my own strategies for staying sane. The following are five things I do to keep myself sane as a single father. My scenario is definitely the polar opposite of this, with my daughter’s mother being a helicopter mom who tries to control every area of her daughter’s life. When I have a “co-parent” who is a helicopter, I know they are involved in my child’s life. The difficult part is when you’re worried of their involvement and how it can harm your child. Regardless, the other parent has a role to play in your child’s life, whether they succeed or not. And, in order for your child to develop, you must acknowledge not only that they have a job to play, but also that I cannot fill that position. Yes, I will advise my daughter to seek out other female role models. And I aim to introduce respectable and loving women into my daughter’s life. However, they will never be able to take the position of her mother. They are incapable of loving her in the way that a mother can. And no matter how much they try, they will never sacrifice in the same manner that a mother would. I need to be able to let go of my ability to perform the role of mother and let her mother to do so.

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