I first became interested in art when I was in school. People-pleasers frequently lack awareness of the limits they must establish in their own life. But you can begin by becoming aware of your actions. It may seem challenging at first, but it’s crucial that you begin to pay attention to what is occurring and recognize what needs to change. Make a list of the things you now do, such as getting coffee for a coworker, that make you feel sad or used, and rank them in order of significance, placing the most important items at the top. You won’t feel the need to compromise who you are by using this straightforward technique. Setting boundaries enables you to refuse requests from people who are abusing your time or asking for assistance. Keep in mind that you are not being selfish; rather, you just have enough self-assurance in who you are to realize that it is acceptable not to always comply with requests. You’ll have more time and energy to do what you actually want to do as soon as you quit finding reasons not to. You’ll experience a greater sense of control over your life and less vulnerability to the needs of others. Making an excuse each time someone asks you to do anything for them, such as “Sorry, I’m afraid I can’t do it, because…,” might prevent you from striking a balance between work and life and leaving you with little time for your interests. (Or, to put it another way: You’ll burn out.) There is nothing more annoying than being exploited and taken advantage of, which is what it also means that others will start abusing your kindness.
