I got a call a few days ago from a friend, completely out of the blue. I was startled to hear from her because I don’t talk to her very often. She asked my opinion on a matter pertaining to forgiveness. She had battled with someone who had badly damaged her for a significant portion of her life. She continued by saying that she thought the significant illness she was experiencing was partly due to the harm that had been done to her and the ongoing emotional and psychological conflict she had to deal with. The most of you, I’m sure, have at some point felt that a person you loved enough about had hurt you, made you angry, or made you sad as a result of a serious breakdown in your relationship. This might be the result of a simple misunderstanding or a staged betrayal. Can you move past someone wronging you in order to continue your relationship? Or is the harm already beyond repair? What if the relationship is too intimate or personal for you to end? For example, what if it is with your parents, siblings, spouse, or an old friend? I gave this person my heart and my experience in what I said, but I also learnt a lot from her about the repercussions of not forgiving. What transpires to a person as a wound swells and intensifies? Then I was shocked to learn that there was the whole dynamic of holding on to hurt as a way of being, though perhaps I shouldn’t have been. In other words, the hurt you feel changes the way you live. How do you ever go on from that? So many concerns and inquiries. I think where I’m going with all of this, and this is just my view, is that it’s important to find forgiveness for your personal happiness as well as for your long-term health and sanity.