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why would my parents do this to me

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One of the most important types of forgiveness is forgiving our parents, which is a key responsibility of adulthood. We see our parents in our friends, coworkers, bosses, and even our children. We will inevitably feel rejected by these significant persons if we have been rejected by a parent and have remained in that situation. But, according to psychologist Robert Karen, letting our parents off the hook is the first step toward contentment, self-acceptance, and maturity. Parental animosity does more than keep a parent in the doghouse. We get locked there, too, as the victim, the have-not, and the child in the sphere of love. Parental sins are some of the most difficult to forgive. We have high hopes for them and do not want to be disappointed. We hope, often unconsciously, that they will ultimately do the right thing by us decade after decade. We want them to take responsibility for their actions, apologize, and make earnest requests for forgiveness. We want our parents to embrace us, to tell us they know we were nice kids, to undo whatever partiality they may have given to one of our siblings, to retract their painful judgments, and to lavish praise on us. With a few exceptions, most parents adore their children. However, no parent is flawless, which means that everyone has wounds from childhood.

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