The “real thing”—getting married—is one of the most exhilarating life events there is. Few things, though, are quite as depressing as discovering we are attached to the wrong person. In order to make wise choices regarding who to marry, it is imperative that we educate ourselves on the characteristics of healthy relationships. The steps are completed in this order, and no step should ever be more complex than the one before it. A relationship should not be committed to if one feels unreliable in the relationship. Our degree of dedication will rise as we come to realize that we can rely on and trust our companion. On the commitment scale, agreeing to marry someone is at the top. Sincerely getting to know someone takes time. Many married couples find they never stop learning new things about each other. Even though it can be annoying to ask questions, it’s crucial to get to know the other person as much as you can. For example, it could be a good idea for us to inquire, “Why would anyone do that?” if our date brings up issues from a past relationship. The response may reveal a great deal about their mentality and relationship annoyances. Compatibility can be assessed with some knowledge of the other person. But getting to know the other person isn’t meant to be used as leverage in a relationship.
